The mental part to family relationships is three-fold. For one it is the input that I gather as I study another person. Covered in the last entry were the questions to ask yourself to gather such insight.
OUR THOUGHTS ARE ONLY HELPFUL IF THEY CAN BE READ
The second element is what information that I give about myself. The more I trust my spouse or brother or parent or friend; the more I am willing to be transparent. Too many have shorted their closest relationships by not divulging enough. If we keep our perspectives and ideologies inside we are not giving much help to those who are trying to be relational with us. No wonder people freak out after two months of marriage saying, “This is not the person that I married!” This is not all intentional at this point, but it can be.
TAKE THE CHALLENGE
There is another application to mentally relating- thinking together. I have some advantage in this area, although I do not always maximize it. We homeschool our children, so nearly everyday there are opportunities to do some problem solving or discovering how something works. Just today, my oldest son and I analyzed poetry and learned some new principles of algebra. It is about putting our brains together to accomplish the goal. Again, be intentional. Take advantage as usable situations arise, but do not always wait for one. Create some thinking moments. Anything that we can accomplish together brings us closer.
You try it!
· Ask “how would we build a house?”
· Mentally fix the world’s hunger problem.
· Put a puzzle together.
· Figure out how much money it takes per mile to drive to grandmas.
· Calculate how old each family member is in minutes.
Focus your attention on your family relationships today. How can we know each other better, and how can a mental challenge bring you closer.Next time we will look at how spirituality counts in building our relationships.
Find other great family helps at:http://www.olearynazarene.com/
Wednesday, 23 May 2007
Monday, 21 May 2007
The Four Essentials of Relationship- Mental part 1
I have heard many people use the phrase, "God gave us gray matter for a reason." The point is that God did make us with a brain to use for solving problems, discerning situations, and even to build on new ideas. How does this work in relationships?
We need to be constantly searching out truth. There are so many things that are important to know. Many truths are necessary to know. We could needlessly be suffering through any number of difficulties because we just don't know what to do about it. Because we do not know everything about those who come close to us, it is easy to make judgements based only on the small amount of information that we do know.
We have acquaintances that we are friendly to, but stay only at the friendly level. They are not like those who get really close to us, who we begin to trust on a deeper level. Closest of all are those, like our spouses, that we strive not only to be completely transparent, but to really know them as well. On any of these levels, we can apply this mental or intellectual part of relating to others.
BECOME A STUDENT OF YOUR FAMILY
Think of the most important relationships that you have, and begin to study them. What do they like to do? What do they never want to do? What would they most likely pick to eat if they had a choice? When will they just jump in to a conversation, and when will they walk away? How do they react to arguments? All of this and more gives us great insight to people. You can probably answer these questions easily. The question is are you applying what you know.
The Focused Family, remember, is made up of people who are intentional about their relationships. Then my question to you is what are you doing with the information that you have to enhance your relationships?
Next time we will look at relating mentally and ways to exercise intellectually with others.
Find other great family helps at:
http://www.olearynazarene.com/
We need to be constantly searching out truth. There are so many things that are important to know. Many truths are necessary to know. We could needlessly be suffering through any number of difficulties because we just don't know what to do about it. Because we do not know everything about those who come close to us, it is easy to make judgements based only on the small amount of information that we do know.
We have acquaintances that we are friendly to, but stay only at the friendly level. They are not like those who get really close to us, who we begin to trust on a deeper level. Closest of all are those, like our spouses, that we strive not only to be completely transparent, but to really know them as well. On any of these levels, we can apply this mental or intellectual part of relating to others.
BECOME A STUDENT OF YOUR FAMILY
Think of the most important relationships that you have, and begin to study them. What do they like to do? What do they never want to do? What would they most likely pick to eat if they had a choice? When will they just jump in to a conversation, and when will they walk away? How do they react to arguments? All of this and more gives us great insight to people. You can probably answer these questions easily. The question is are you applying what you know.
The Focused Family, remember, is made up of people who are intentional about their relationships. Then my question to you is what are you doing with the information that you have to enhance your relationships?
Next time we will look at relating mentally and ways to exercise intellectually with others.
Find other great family helps at:
http://www.olearynazarene.com/
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